Out of my way, I’m a motorist!

We have roving gangs of kids on scooters in my apartment complex. Actually, I think a scooter pops out of every mom’s womb between kid and afterbirth in the city of Kent. One of these kids left his prized possession/birthright out last night, and I decided I couldn’t resist the temptation to take it for a spin.

Anyone who happened to look out their window around 10:30 last night would’ve seen me careening around corners and jumping off of speed bumps. Frankly, I don’t care if people think I’m acting like I’m 7 instead of 27, that was ridiculously fun and if it’s still out there when I get home, I’m doing it again.

Now that the weather is cooperating, I plan to actually learn how to use my Heelies so that I may terrorize actual adults in grocery stores as I go whizzing down the aisles.

16 Comments Out of my way, I’m a motorist!

  1. agentdanak May 21, 2009 at 5:04 pm

    they make heelies in adult sizes? oh fuck.

  2. princessgeek May 21, 2009 at 5:10 pm

    SRSLY I didn’t know i could have heelies.

    1. admin May 21, 2009 at 5:15 pm

      We should start a heely gang!

      1. princessgeek May 21, 2009 at 5:19 pm

        Heelies and trenchcoats!

        1. admin May 21, 2009 at 5:23 pm

          I was hoping more for Heelies and glitter lycra (I want to look like an unstoppable MACK truck of a disco ball), but I guess trenchcoats will suffice in inspiring terror.

          1. variax May 21, 2009 at 5:25 pm

            There’s certainly no reason why you couldn’t have a glitter trenchcoat.

          2. admin May 21, 2009 at 5:33 pm

            Do you want to be in our Glitter Heely Gang?

          3. variax May 21, 2009 at 6:30 pm

            Nice. I always wanted to play Glitter Heely Diesel.

          4. princessgeek May 21, 2009 at 8:00 pm

            I bid on a rainbow pair on ebay! Woot!

          5. princessgeek May 21, 2009 at 8:00 pm

            omg this might pair well with my vagina army idea. Vagina army on wheels. yes.

          6. admin May 21, 2009 at 8:07 pm

            Can only people with vaginas be in the Vagina Army On Wheels or can supporters of the vagina join? If it’s only people with vaginas, our first outing might have to be after Rob has his sex change.

          7. variax May 21, 2009 at 8:59 pm

            Would it suffice for me to purchase a Fleshlight™?
            I could put glitter on it.

          8. princessgeek May 21, 2009 at 9:25 pm

            Well I am currently in negotiations to create a vagina dress. I believe if a man wanted to dress as a vagina that would be killer.

          9. shadowstitch May 22, 2009 at 3:59 am

            Don’t they already have those?

            …I think they’re called Roller Derbies.

  3. mschilepepper May 22, 2009 at 11:03 pm

    There’s a scooter at my house you can borrow any ol’ time you want, darling.

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