We have roving gangs of kids on scooters in my apartment complex. Actually, I think a scooter pops out of every mom’s womb between kid and afterbirth in the city of Kent. One of these kids left his prized possession/birthright out last night, and I decided I couldn’t resist the temptation to take it for a spin.
Anyone who happened to look out their window around 10:30 last night would’ve seen me careening around corners and jumping off of speed bumps. Frankly, I don’t care if people think I’m acting like I’m 7 instead of 27, that was ridiculously fun and if it’s still out there when I get home, I’m doing it again.
Now that the weather is cooperating, I plan to actually learn how to use my Heelies so that I may terrorize actual adults in grocery stores as I go whizzing down the aisles.
they make heelies in adult sizes? oh fuck.
Well, I have child-size feet (my next acquistion might well be light-up dinosaur shoes ffs) but yes they do make them for adults!
SRSLY I didn’t know i could have heelies.
We should start a heely gang!
Heelies and trenchcoats!
I was hoping more for Heelies and glitter lycra (I want to look like an unstoppable MACK truck of a disco ball), but I guess trenchcoats will suffice in inspiring terror.
There’s certainly no reason why you couldn’t have a glitter trenchcoat.
Do you want to be in our Glitter Heely Gang?
Nice. I always wanted to play Glitter Heely Diesel.
I bid on a rainbow pair on ebay! Woot!
omg this might pair well with my vagina army idea. Vagina army on wheels. yes.
Can only people with vaginas be in the Vagina Army On Wheels or can supporters of the vagina join? If it’s only people with vaginas, our first outing might have to be after Rob has his sex change.
Would it suffice for me to purchase a Fleshlight™?
I could put glitter on it.
Well I am currently in negotiations to create a vagina dress. I believe if a man wanted to dress as a vagina that would be killer.
Don’t they already have those?
…I think they’re called Roller Derbies.
There’s a scooter at my house you can borrow any ol’ time you want, darling.