I have been getting various things through the mail for an upcoming event, the details of which I am not yet revealing, on April 20th. (By the way, you should all mark your calendars to be available that day from 6-11pm, or you will be mad at yourselves FOREVER.) This basically means that I’ve been getting packages in the mail every day for about a week and a half.
I don’t get snotty remarks anymore. The office people address me politely by name, and when they see me out walking Napoleon, they gather up whatever packages I’ve got and have the ready for when I walk by the office. The apartment manager also said that if I want to renew my lease, I should talk to her and she’ll only bump me $10 per month instead of the $55 everyone else is getting.
Then, yesterday, I got this on my door.
I think this means I’ve won! Many thanks to everyone who helped make this campaign of irritation and absurdity work–you’ve won, too. Fuckin’ A.
I’d hate to tell you what I’ll be doing on 4/20…
Although if you stare at it long enough, it starts to get really creepy, as if it’s saying “Hello. I’m here for your head, which I will then place in this box.”
Re: I’d hate to tell you what I’ll be doing on 4/20…
I never trust anyone who shows that much gum when they smile.
You are hereby excused from 4/20’s event. I know I’m going to get every @&#@ stoner on the planet going “4:20, oh WOW MAN” but honestly, it’s only because my birthday is 4/21 and I’m not going to get anyone to come out on a goddamn MONDAY. Thanks, leap year!
Re: I’d hate to tell you what I’ll be doing on 4/20…
Eh. If they’re not willing to celebrate 4/20 before or after your birthday party they’re sucky friends. Unless, of course they will be 2575 miles away, in which case never mind.
Re: I’d hate to tell you what I’ll be doing on 4/20…
Oh, I didn’t mean they’d SKIP it, only that they’d repeat the same thing every other stoner does when they see my driver’s license: “Oh MAN, you were like, SO FREAKING CLOSE to having, like, a FREAKING AWESOME BIRTHDAY, man. 4-20, man!”
Like, yeah, I know. I was, like, so freaking high that I forgot to be born on time, man.
$10? My rent went up $350 last spring. Sigh.
The last time my rent jumped that much, I gave the apartment manager the finger and moved out.
You live at Kently Pointe? My friends the Stockdales live there. Small world. (I knew them before they shared a last name… or had a kid.)
I only remember it, because seriously, Kently Pointe is the most hilarious name for an apartment complex that I saw in all of 2007.
Consider it jotted into my calendar.
I don’t really know any of my neighbors except Ali (who showed me the apartment in the first place) and Roberto, who just moved in upstairs, blasts mariachi music, and has apparently taken a shine to me.
I really wanted to move into Signature Pointe (<- also with an extraneous 'e') next door as their apartments are SO MUCH NICER but they charge way too much for Kent.
Plan on getting thyself to the eastside.
Going in a Kently direction is no problem, I just take the 150.
But I’m planning on getting myself to U District. Maybe I should rent a truck.
If you’d like I can introduce you to Z and E sometime. They are big board game geeks.
Oh no, not in a Kently direction. A Kirkland direction.
When you said “plan on getting thyself to the eastside,” I was ever so confused, and it was not just the archaic pronoun. I searched “eastside Seattle” and got Cpaitol Hill, which garnered a raised eyebrow. It looks like a 255 will bring me there (wherever there is) post haste.
“Kently Pointe”? Really?
I *am* available on 4/20, but at entirely the wrong end of the west coast that day.
But of course. The extraneous ‘e’ at the end of the name makes me feel middle class even when beer cans are consistently left on top of the bushes.
Also, wrong end of the west coast? Unacceptable.
It’s not my fault you live in a place that I think I wouldn’t enjoy much instead of a place that I’m going to see largely to confirm that I never want to live there. Also, a former roommate has been trying to get me to visit for eight years; it might have been better to take him up on that while he lived in Santa Barbara.
Going to LA, are you?
Surely that’s not the only bit of southern California that I never want to live in, but yes.
Eventually I’ll have seen all of the largest cities, and might have some notion of where size becomes a problem for me. Possibly not a great plan, as it suggests a need, on some level, to see Houston.
I’m pretty sure some places can be knocked off your list just by virtue of location alone–it doesn’t matter how large the city is if it SUCKS.
I hate LA. SO MUCH.
But if we look at location alone, shouldn’t LA have been wonderful?
So far, I’ve got (from 2006 rankings):
1. New York – very few things could make me step foot in that hellhole again.
2. LA – we’ll see, soon, but my hopes are not high.
3. Chicago – I’ve loved visiting. Not sure how I’d feel about it if I needed to get around; 99% certain I’d hate the winters.
4. DC – I really want to see it again when I’m not still getting over mono, and when there’s time to appreciate some of the museums. But my desire not to live there is strong enough to keep me from running for Congress.
5. Boston – see Chicago, except that my visits have been long enough to be pretty sure I actually *like* the city, and I know that I could at least survive the weather, if not the darkness, of a winter there.
6. San Francisco – I hear good things. Small chance of getting there in October.
7. Philadelphia – I don’t particularly hear good things. Only ever knew one couple who lived there, and they’re in Knoxville these days, so don’t know when I’d ever go (though I also need to see Delaware at some point, and that’s nearby)
8. Dallas – I’d take it before New York, but not much before. *Winter* in Dallas is too muggy, and DFW is far better for layovers than for arrivals and departures.
9. Houston – Everyone I’ve known from there is an asshole of the highest magnitude. I have not been given reason to believe this is a statistical anomaly, even by those who are married to Houstonians. Appears to be everything I hate about Dallas, but more so.
10. Atlanta – I like it, and it’s the highest on the list that I’ve got meaningful experience in, but almost never try to drive in the city during the week, so I don’t really know how I’d do with *living* there. MARTA doesn’t appear to run in particularly useful directions.
11. Miami/Ft. Lauderdale – All my relatives in the area are counting down to retirement so they can move to Utah. I’m not sure about the Utah part, but it’s certainly not a place where I would want to spend more than a week or two at a time.
12. Detroit – Have driven through. That was more than enough.
13. Phoenix – Haven’t been. Probably on the “knocked off by location” list, though; northern Arizona was oppressively hot in August, even by my standards which think Atlanta isn’t that bad.
14. Seattle – dunno. *Should* have seen it last summer, if business partners weren’t insane morons.
15. Minneapolis – I suspect I’d love it in summer, and be dead of a combination of hypothermia and Seasonal Affective Disorder within three days in winter. See Seattle for last summer, though I would probably have been there the day the bridge collapsed, so I’m slightly less upset about this one.
16. Denver – Has a lot to recommend it. Also has insane traffic, blizzards, and unfortunate proximity to my stepmother, but it’s with Atlanta on the short list of BIG cities that I’ve been to and would consider living in.
17. San Diego – dunno.
18. Cleveland – I’d go to Chicago first. Have only been through at 1AM, so it probably doesn’t mean much that I wasn’t impressed.
19. St. Louis – A *little* chilly, but I’d move there without much hesitation. If Google had an office there, I’d apply tomorrow.
20. Tampa – Might be tempting if I were more of a beach person, but the road layouts make no sense to me (which is also true in Boston, but in Tampa these are roads that came about in the era of highway engineering, so they’re deliberate clusterfucks).
I’ll stop there since I don’t have much to say about 21-30. It looks like I’m somewhere around “No bigger than Denver (~3 million people), if it’s reasonably layed out and the weather’s not too terrible”.
Didja decide where you’re having the party yet?
I’m doing it at Laughs in Kirkland. I like the space, I know the owners, and the liquor minimum is the best of anywhere I’ve looked. I *really* like the VIP room at Neumo’s, but the horror stories on Yelp really made me reticent to try and book there.
You’re coming, right? 🙂
I will absolutely endeavor to attend! Hmm, probably need to find a date.
Need me to help do anything/
At this stage, I’m not sure, but I’ll let you know when I think of something. 😀
Soooo, is it wrong of me to still send mine?
I’ve got it all packaged for Saturday.
Wrong? Absolutely not. Right? Assuredly. 😉
He is on the way.
I call him…. MexiClause. Or perhaps LatinoClause. I’m still sad I didn’t get the matching set. His woman, she was browtastic.
you so totally won. but what the hell is that weird bubble boy package-bearer?
we shall be rocking to Kraftwerk on your almost-yr-birthday!
I approve of Kraftwerk as an alternative activity to SPECTACULAR SPECTACULAR 2008.
Happy Birthday Hitler?
LOL I’m a fan of dark comedy but goddamn I don’t think I could get away with that one!