Monster Movies Part III

October 16th Tremors color, 1990. I used to love this movie, and one line in particular struck me and made me giggle every time–“Judas PRIEST that stinks!” I waited eagerly to hear it again…and realized that the line I’d loved so much had been in the edited-for-tv version, and in the non-edited version, it was the more plain “JESUS CHRIST that stinks!” More blasphemous? Maybe, depending on who you’re talking to. But definitely more boring.

October 17th Piranha II: The Spawning color, 1981. Holy hell, this was awful. And awesome. And awful. But awesome. Bonus points for starting the movie with a graphic underwater sex scene. Bonus points for really cheesy flying murderous fish. Minus points for ripping off one of the greatest movies of all time. (edit: Jaws.)

October 18th Reno 911 Halloween Episode color, 2003. No, not a movie, really. But to be frank and honest, I didn’t have a lot of time between work and going to see Rob Zombie, and when I got home, it was too late and I was too ston tired to watch something full-length. But Rob Zombie showed a lot of clips from ‘House of 1000 Corpses’ and ‘The Devil’s Rejects’ during his set–does that count?

October 19th The Nightmare Before Christmas in 3D variax joined me for the movie, and I didn’t think it was possible, but I loved it even more in 3D. Stylistically, it’s a movie that transitions very well to 3D, to the point where I felt like I was hanging out in Halloween Town. It was worth the drive to cow-town through pouring rain and flooded-out roads.

October 20th Slumber Party Massacre color, 1982. I’m pretty sure that the only reason they include the basketball scene near the beginning is so that they could have a shower scene immediately afterward; which is even more peculiar since it parades itself around as a movie written by, directed by, and starring women, based on a book by a well-known feminist writer. For all that, I saw a hell of a lot of T&A in this movie. The serial killer wears a White Trash Suit–jeans with a jean jacket, something I’ve also heard referred to as the Canadian Tuxedo. So every time the murderer appeared onscreen, it was accompanied by exclamations of “Look out, it’s the Canadian!”

…He kills everyone with a portable drill, and doesn’t talk until the end, at which point I wished he’d never opened his mouth.

The best scene in the movie, by far, is when one of the girls finds a buzz saw with which to go after the serial killer, picks it up, and runs with it…not realizing that it was plugged into the wall, and she’s knocked off of her feet when she runs out of cord.

Also, I miss movies that tell you exactly what is going to happen in the title.

October 21st Ringu color, 1998. I figured I’d rather see the original than the remake, even if it means that reading subtitles might take away from the overall scariness. Now, I have been watching a lot of cheesy scary movies this month, but this is still by far one of the scariest movies I’ve ever seen. Still nothing to keep me from sleeping properly, but I hope to find more movies that follow this creepier, less visceral vein–gore doesn’t scare me. Even when he’s talking about the environment.

Up tonight: Alice, Sweet Alice.

14 Comments Monster Movies Part III

  1. pretzelcoatl October 22, 2007 at 9:15 pm

    *looks back at the other movies you’ve watched* Ooo, that’s right! I own the Vampire Hunter D movies. *rubs hands together* EXCELLENT.

    Have you ever seen Shivers? If not, you should at some point. Sexually-transmitted slugs turning people into sex-crazed zombies! It writes itself!

    1. admin October 22, 2007 at 9:29 pm

      I’ve got such a nerd-love for Vampire Hunter D that I’ve got the cross from Bloodlust tattooed on the back of my neck. I need to get it cleaned up, unfortunately, as the tattoo artist dug into my neck HARD and thusly it didn’t heal nicely, but it’s been 5 years and I don’t regret it.

      Thanks for the reccommendation!

  2. dslartoo October 22, 2007 at 9:59 pm

    Minus points for ripping off one of the greatest movies of all time.

    …..please tell me you’re not talking about the first film. 🙂


    1. admin October 22, 2007 at 10:03 pm

      Oh god, no. I’m talking about Jaws. I suppose I should clarify that, huh?

  3. darwinpolice October 22, 2007 at 10:52 pm

    Ringu was inferior to The Ring in every conceivable way save for the fact that The Ring doesn’t let you feel special because you’re watching a movie that’s not in English.

    There. I said it. 🙂

    1. admin October 22, 2007 at 11:01 pm

      I’ve heard they were very stylistically different, with The Ring having a lot of the now-standard ‘jump’ scares–I like it because it’s different, not because it makes me feel special. I’m already special enough, honeybunches.

      1. darwinpolice October 22, 2007 at 11:04 pm

        No, you’re not. ONLY I AM A SNOWFLAKE, NOT YOU.

        1. admin October 22, 2007 at 11:06 pm


          1. darwinpolice October 22, 2007 at 11:23 pm

            Oh yeah? I challenge you to a peeing-while-standing-up contest!

          2. admin October 23, 2007 at 12:09 am

            Am I allowed to practice first?


          3. variax October 24, 2007 at 9:12 pm

            Get the Edge

          4. admin October 24, 2007 at 10:25 pm

            I have highlighted that link and determined I should not click it at work.

          5. variax October 24, 2007 at 10:32 pm

            I was perhaps negligent in not putting NSFW stickers on that link.

          6. admin October 24, 2007 at 10:37 pm

            I believe I was tricked link-wise by you once in the past and have since learned your wicked ways!

Comments are closed.