Spotted on the Roadside: The Church of God-Zillah

July 24, 2015 Comments Off read Pacific, Spotted on the Roadside, Travel, USA, Washington, West

In the town of Zilla, WA, is a glorious pun come to life…or half-life anyway. It all started as a joke, with the reverend of the then Christian Worship Center being called the leader of the Church of God-Zillah, and being a B-movie fan, he decided to embrace it and build a fire and brimstone-breathing lure to get people to come to church. Not being one to be too prideful of his creation, however, it’s tucked behind the church instead of out front–if you didn’t go looking for it, you would have no idea it’s there. It’s my understanding that they originally intended to skin it and outfit it with motion detectors so its eyes would light up as cars passed by, but given that it was constructed almost fifteen years ago and no progress has been made on that front, the saddest little ‘zilla in Zillah languishes naked before god and everyone. All I know is if a dino with glowing red eyes showed up on my doorstep and asked if I had moment to talk about our lord and savior, I wouldn’t shut the door in his face.

Spotted on Cheyne Rd in Zillah, WA

City of Roses: Portland’s International Rose Test Garden

July 22, 2015 Comments Off read Attractions, Oregon, Pacific, The Great Outdoors, Travel, USA, West

In 1905, Portland held a Lewis and Clark Exposition for the 100th anniversary of the duo’s stay in Oregon. For that grand event, the city planted half a million pink rosebushes along Portland’s streets. Two years later, in 1907, the “city of roses” held its first annual Rose Festival, a tradition which is alive and well today (as are many of the original rosebushes!).

Portland has long had a reputation for being where the weird comes to flourish, and it even holds true for their rose gardens. In 1917, rose enthusiasts came up with the idea of creating an American rose test garden, and not long after that, the International Rose Test Garden came to be. Portland also served as a “safe haven” for hybridized roses from Europe during World War I. Owing to their mild climate, roses absolutely thrive in Portland, and the International Rose Test Garden is a way for the worldwide rose enthusiast community to try different varietals for disease resistance, fragrance, and color as well as other desirable attributes.

From May through October, you can see and smell nearly 550 varietals of roses in the test garden, though they are at their heady, glorious peak in June (which coincides with Portland’s Rose Festival). And definitely take the time to stop and smell them all! They blew me away with their vibrancy, their color, their scent, and the way they aren’t just woody, thorny, shitty sticks like the roses I’ve tried to grow in my yard. Or the $50 hydrangea I planted this year that committed plant suicide a week later. Portland, lend me some of your flower-growing voodoo!

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Spotted on the Roadside: The Licorice Shrine in Poulsbo, WA

July 17, 2015 Comments Off read Attractions, Masticating With Mellzah, Pacific, Spotted on the Roadside, Travel, USA, Washington, West

There are two licorice camps: people who love black licorice, and people who are wrong. I’m a ride or die black licorice fan, so when I saw that there was a bonafide licorice shrine at the Marina Market in Poulsbo, I had to check it out.

I have never seen so much black licorice in my life. It didn’t encompass just that end cap, but another endcap as well as an entire aisle. Worlds of licorice. I didn’t even know this much black licorice variety existed! I’ve eaten salted black licorice before (and loved it) so this time I opted to try something a bit different: the spookily packaged Heksehyl Weerwolven drops, which have a soft caramel center. Holy moly, the only thing that was spooky was how fast the bag disappeared. I definitely want to try the other Heksehyl licorices (one of them looks like it might have been a minty black licorice, which I’m not sure will be good but I want to try it anyway), and I would never say no to Piratos or basically anything on that display other than red licorice which is an abomination and a crime against the licorice lords. Licorice Shrine, I’ll be back!

Spotted on Front Street in Poulsbo, WA