Since we were convinced that Long Beach is a magical kite-flying location, we purchased two kites of our own to have a Godzilla vs Mothra battle on the stretch of beach behind the house, because we’re mature adults.

After we finished flying kites, I waded out into shallow water and ran through the flocks of birds that had amassed nearby, because if I’m going to develop a reputation as a bird-botherer, I’d at least like that reputation to be known far and wide so I can justify strutting around in a leather jacket with a bird-botherer club logo on the back.