I just got this in the mail recently:
Let me tell you something. If I’m one of this nation’s most accomplished women, this country is fucked. This became especially clear when my cereal box informed me that I had not accomplished 18 key goals before I reached the age of 18:
Imagine that. 26 and already washed up!
I’m considering sending in my application and telling the Cambridge people I cured cancer in my sleep, but then forgot how I did it when I huffed paint. I’m also the 2005 International Basket-Weaving Champion, as well as a leading contender for the upcoming Miss America pageant.
I thought they stopped pulling this stunt when people graduated college.
Seriously. Do I really seem like the kind of sucker who wants to buy a ‘handsome, leather-bound edition full of pictures of every other retard who gets sucked into crapola like this’? On the other hand, it’d probably be a good directory to abuse in terms of gathering a great number of gullible, easy-to-please minions.
I’m tempted to buy it just for the photos, now that you’ve described it that way.
“Clem Zeddekker graduated top of his class from Tulsa Welding Academy and currently is the Lead Welding Inspector for Pryor HVAC of Pryor, Oklahoma. He enjoys his work, his family, fishing, NASCAR, and taking his 4×4 out into the mudbogs.”
If you buy it, I’ll want to borrow it. 😀
If you buy it, I’ll want to borrow it. 😀
I’m tempted to buy it just for the photos, now that you’ve described it that way.
“Clem Zeddekker graduated top of his class from Tulsa Welding Academy and currently is the Lead Welding Inspector for Pryor HVAC of Pryor, Oklahoma. He enjoys his work, his family, fishing, NASCAR, and taking his 4×4 out into the mudbogs.”
Seriously. Do I really seem like the kind of sucker who wants to buy a ‘handsome, leather-bound edition full of pictures of every other retard who gets sucked into crapola like this’? On the other hand, it’d probably be a good directory to abuse in terms of gathering a great number of gullible, easy-to-please minions.
I thought they stopped pulling this stunt when people graduated college.
oh man this is all kinds of LOLs
oh man this is all kinds of LOLs
CANDY … FOR BREAKFAST?
Don’t judge me! You don’t know me!
Don’t judge me! You don’t know me!
well when else are you gonna eat it? In between meals? Pfft. Amateur.
mmmmm…. candy for breakfast. It’s the only thing that gets me out of bed. That, and fear of bankruptcy.
The best part about candy for breakfast is that you don’t really even have to get out of bed to eat it.
The best part about candy for breakfast is that you don’t really even have to get out of bed to eat it.
mmmmm…. candy for breakfast. It’s the only thing that gets me out of bed. That, and fear of bankruptcy.
well when else are you gonna eat it? In between meals? Pfft. Amateur.
CANDY … FOR BREAKFAST?
I got one of those too. What a bunch of hoohah.
We are such accomplished individuals, you and I. It’s amazing that we aren’t ruling the world yet!
If I ruled the world, I’d free all my sons…
oh wait. I’m not NAS.
Your pre-18 accomplishments outnumber mine. (I’m close if #3 counts dodge ball).
Item 18 is lame… I guess unless you can’t check it off. Is that a consession to or a hurtful jab at inner-city gang bangers?
And since when does old age start at 18?!
I scored a winning run during kickball, but that was after-school intermurals, so I don’t think it counts. I never joined a sport seriously as I’ve really never been coordinated enough to do one properly. I was like Duane Goad as a kid; I liked swimming because I got to feel weightless.
The thing about not being able to check off #18 is that if you can’t, you’ll never have the opportunity to feel left out!
Somewhere, some git is checking off only #18 and thinking to himself, “oh well, I’m alive at least.”
Somewhere, another git is trying to mark off only #18 but can’t figure out how to take the cap off of the pen.
Somewhere, another git is trying to mark off only #18 but can’t figure out how to take the cap off of the pen.
Somewhere, some git is checking off only #18 and thinking to himself, “oh well, I’m alive at least.”
I scored a winning run during kickball, but that was after-school intermurals, so I don’t think it counts. I never joined a sport seriously as I’ve really never been coordinated enough to do one properly. I was like Duane Goad as a kid; I liked swimming because I got to feel weightless.
The thing about not being able to check off #18 is that if you can’t, you’ll never have the opportunity to feel left out!
Your pre-18 accomplishments outnumber mine. (I’m close if #3 counts dodge ball).
Item 18 is lame… I guess unless you can’t check it off. Is that a consession to or a hurtful jab at inner-city gang bangers?
And since when does old age start at 18?!
I don’t think you’d make Miss America, that picture of you rolling down the hill is a bit ‘racy’.
You never told me you were into Basket Weaving, you know how to make a man weak in the knees.
It *does* imply several things:
-snake in the grass
-open to suggestion
-second gunman
Stop it, I need a cold shower
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
It *does* imply several things:
-snake in the grass
-open to suggestion
-second gunman
I don’t think you’d make Miss America, that picture of you rolling down the hill is a bit ‘racy’.
You never told me you were into Basket Weaving, you know how to make a man weak in the knees.
I think this calls for a good ole OMGWTFBBQ!!!
http://www.kreativekorp.com/miscpages/omgwtfbbq/
It should be a BBBQ. The extra B is for BYOBB.
Looks like this is a “Cambridge Who’s Who Of Who Is A Complete Retard”. Apparently people pay $100-$1000 to get their name and picture in a completely irrelevant book.
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/272887/cambridge_whos_who_who_is_going_to.html?cat=7
Oh yeah, it’s such a well-known scam it was even mentioned on The Simpsons–I don’t know how companies think they’ll get away with the kind of shit they’ve pulled in the past in the age of the internet. 😀
I don’t think that I really discovered anything before age 18 unless you count boys, and I’m pretty sure they were discovered before I got around to them. My science olympiad projects were all pretty substandard.