A whole new pair of pants has risen up in the fight against me. This particular pair, I discovered on Saturday, I could take off and put on without going through the hassle of buttons and zips, yet my hips were enough to keep them up. This is a nigh-perfect Jeans Situation to be in.
Except, of course, the jeans were merely luring me into a trap. On Saturday, I was walking Napoleon, went to get the mail, and saw I had a package in the office, so I picked that up as well. With both hands occupied, I made my way back to my apartment, at which time, my pants sprung their trap and fell down. I flailed wildly for a few moments, as Napoleon at that EXACT MOMENT spotted another animal that he felt he must destroy, and started yanking me forward as I was attempting to maneuver the package and mail to the ground and pull up the renegade pants.
No fewer than three neighbors witnessed this.
*I* am the definition of class.
Sexy
Yeah, combine that with a doctor looking at my ladybits tomorrow, and that’ll be the most action my nethers have seen in…going on two years now!
I should think that the Power of Your Meringue can change that.
I know if you give me some more of that meringue I would be completely at your mercy. Oh yes….
Mellzah’s Merciless Meringue (L4,Wiz)
That meringue was pretty good, indeed.
Re: Mellzah’s Merciless Meringue (L4,Wiz)
Apparently I need to spend some more time in the kitchen!
In my mind, there was a Scooby-Doo sound effect playing also.
The Scooby-Doo ‘WHAT/huh?’ noise would work quite well there.
I was thinking something more along these lines.
That would work, too! My life is a cartoon.
Maybe you need smaller pants! With all that working out I bet you have gone down a size or two!
I’m hoping to hold off pants shopping for a little while, though I’m sure I’ve gone down at least one size. I think belts plus a trip through the dryer on ‘scalding’ should shrink them a little and do the trick.
I second‘ suggestion, you may want to invest in new pants to go with a new belt. I’ve had similar dilemmas myself. Want to go pants shopping?
I’m going to hold off on the pants shopping for a while until all of the pants in my closet are too big–I plan to continue this downward trend and don’t want to spend a ton of money on interim clothes. 🙂
I’m excited for Phoriday this week!
Hold on to your pants excited. (I have no idea what that’s supposed to mean. I’m already asleep.)
Also, have you thought about sporting suspenders?
Hell no. I’m not Ashton Kutcher OR Steve Urkel.
Nor are you a lumberjack.
That’s why I stay away from flannel. But not axes.
Speaking of, is there a cafe or dessert place we can go for post-pho?
I’d suggest Common Ground Coffee + Cupcakes, but I think they close at 8. :\
So to answer your question, I dunno.
Well we do have a crack team of internet addicts, I’m sure we’ll find something.
Maybe you can start a “flood the office with belts” campaign..
I need to make an update post about that–it’s gotten to the point where when someone in the office sees me walking Napoleon around, they get any and all packages ready for me for when I pass by, and are now polite as can be about it. I’m pretty sure this means I’ve won.
AWESOME!
This bodes well for your world takeover.. start small.
Are you sure you’re not related to my Dad? I keep threatening to install snaps on his hips so he can just snap his pants on each day and they won’t fall down. It’s either that, or the staple gun, but I think the permanent snaps would be a far more elegant solution. Hey, they can do it for guys’ toupees, so why not pants?
With hip snaps, I could be the lamest cyborg ever. Which is, mind, a step up from pure meat-puppet. However, I fear my delicate skin will reject the snaps. 🙁