{"id":1839,"date":"2010-11-15T12:42:00","date_gmt":"2010-11-15T12:42:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mellzah.com\/?p=1839"},"modified":"2015-05-18T10:54:29","modified_gmt":"2015-05-18T17:54:29","slug":"a-day-with-just-the-right-amount-of-junk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mellzah.com\/index.php\/a-day-with-just-the-right-amount-of-junk\/","title":{"rendered":"A day with just the right amount of junk."},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/mellzah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/wedslabyrinth2.jpeg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-7097\" alt=\"wedslabyrinth2\" src=\"https:\/\/mellzah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/wedslabyrinth2-1024x690.jpeg\" width=\"687\" height=\"462\" srcset=\"https:\/\/mellzah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/wedslabyrinth2-1024x690.jpeg 1024w, https:\/\/mellzah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/wedslabyrinth2-300x202.jpeg 300w, https:\/\/mellzah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/wedslabyrinth2-150x101.jpeg 150w, https:\/\/mellzah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/wedslabyrinth2-1200x809.jpeg 1200w, https:\/\/mellzah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/wedslabyrinth2-400x269.jpeg 400w, https:\/\/mellzah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/wedslabyrinth2-800x539.jpeg 800w, https:\/\/mellzah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/wedslabyrinth2-200x134.jpeg 200w, https:\/\/mellzah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/wedslabyrinth2.jpeg 1293w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 687px) 100vw, 687px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Yesterday, confusednazgul hosted a Labyrinth-watching party, to which I invited myself&#8211;a fairly bold\/rude move on my part, given that we&#8217;d never actually met in person before. I was fairly certain, however, that she wasn&#8217;t going to up and murder me in a back room, and also I was promised crabcakes. Crabcakes and David Bowie Glitterjunk may well be THE enticement required to lure me just about anywhere.<\/p>\n<p>One of my more useful not-so-superpowers is to be able to walk into a room of strangers and be able to strike up conversations, so while I didn&#8217;t know anyone going in, by the end of the day, we were cracking jokes and having impromptu raise-the-roof dance parties in the middle of the swankiest apartment building I&#8217;ve ever had the pleasure of seeing firsthand. It was seriously swanky. In addition to the movie theater, it had a fancy coffee bar, media center, gathering room with a ridiculous amount of TVs, a central wine-storage location&#8230;even the bathroom mirrors had embedded TVs, in case you couldn&#8217;t bear to be away from one for a moment while washing your hands! Just to put it in perspective, in MY apartment complex, people keep fucking up the hot tub by adding soap and one of my neighbors decorated for Thanksgiving by writing &#8216;Happy Thanksgiving&#8217; backward on her window in what appeared to be black magic marker. (Christ, I wish I had gotten a picture of it before it disappeared later that afternoon!)<\/p>\n<p>After the movie, we took the party elevator up to the roof, petted the world&#8217;s tiniest puppy, and peered in the window of a four million dollar condo to watch a man playing World of Warcraft sans pants and debate about whether or not he was wearing boxers. After we each took a turn peeping at him with binoculars (hot DAMN one of these girls was a proper girlscout), we came to the general conclusion that some form of brief was present, though one partygoer insisted that she did indeed see some junk when he leaned back to stretch&#8230;so, in the fashion of the Tootsie Pop Mystery, we may never know.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp; Yesterday, confusednazgul hosted a Labyrinth-watching party, to which I invited myself&#8211;a fairly bold\/rude move on my part, given that we&#8217;d never actually met in person before. I was fairly certain, however, that she wasn&#8217;t going to up and murder me in a back room, and also I was promised crabcakes. Crabcakes and David Bowie&#8230; <span class=\"more\"><a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/mellzah.com\/index.php\/a-day-with-just-the-right-amount-of-junk\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&#8594;<\/span><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7097,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1839","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>A day with just the right amount of junk. &#8226; Mellzah<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/mellzah.com\/index.php\/a-day-with-just-the-right-amount-of-junk\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"A day with just the right amount of junk. &#8226; Mellzah\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"&nbsp; Yesterday, confusednazgul hosted a Labyrinth-watching party, to which I invited myself&#8211;a fairly bold\/rude move on my part, given that we&#8217;d never actually met in person before. 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