I just got back from the optometrist, and shockingly enough, my vision has IMPROVED over the last three years instead of worsened. Perhaps I do not yet have to resign myself to waking up one day, utterly blind.<\/p>\n
After the exam, they laid out my options according to my insurance: they’ll cover up to $120 for glasses frames plus 20% off any amount above and beyond $120. They’ll put $15 toward my lenses, and since I require high-index lenses and edge-rolling so as not to have a coke-bottle-y appearance, I’ll have to pay ~$100 above what insurance will chip in. So base on glasses is ~$100 plus whatever frames I decide on.<\/p>\n
Contacts, for now, are out of the picture. The insurance website made it sound as if they cover contacts entirely, minus the fitting charges. Realistically, they pay ~$100 and I’m immediately out ~$500 plus the continued cost of purchasing more disposables–so I suppose we’ve determined my interest level in contacts, and that level is below $500. Though it would be awfully freaking nice to be able to see just ONE HALLOWEEN OUT OF A DOZEN.<\/p>\n
Having decided on glasses, the receptionist? assistant? at the optometrist’s took it upon herself to try to pick out frames for me, after I told her what I loved about my current glasses. Everything she picked out was met with a resounding ‘NO’; I don’t know what my current frames tell people about my taste, but I can tell you that diarrhea brown with electric green? NOT MY TASTE. Before today, I’d never seen recycled baby turds, but now that I have, I can quite CLEARLY tell you that it’s NOT MY TASTE. It became increasingly difficult to turn down this woman’s choices politely, and finally I said “Look, I have been accused of being nigh-unreasonably choosy. I have known my tastes for twenty-seven years, and you have known me for less than an hour, so not to offend you, but I don’t think you’ll be able to pick out something that I’ll like.”<\/p>\n
…This woman was not a quitter. So I laid out my ground laws: I don’t want rimless, I don’t want wire frames, I don’t want anything round as it not only makes me look rounder in the face but owlish besides, I want a frame that’s thick enough to break up my face visually to give it interest and look less full but not dominate it (I don’t want the glasses to wear me), I prefer metal over plastic as I have a narrow-ish bridge and nosepieces help them stay on my face, I prefer a rectangular shape but am open to cat-eye styles and since this is to be my primary pair, I want a neutral color. Yes. I know. Very fucking picky.<\/p>\n
And yet she kept handing me brightly-colored hugely thick plastics or ultra-skinny wire frames. I found ONE PAIR that I sort-of liked–for $567. Damn these birth control pills, I actually felt myself starting to get upset and hovering on the precipice of weepy over the idea of walking out with expensive glasses that I didn’t love. I asked about the possibility of finding a frame I liked outside of the shop and then ordering it through them–no, that was not a service they offer. I inquired about finding frames I liked and bringing them in to be fitted for lenses–she looked at me rather belligerently and said “Well, *that* won’t be covered by your insurance.”<\/p>\n
Lady, if I find frames I love online for, say, $300, my cost out of pocket for those frames is $300. If I take frames that I’m just OK about from you for $567, my cost out of pocket is $357.60. I’m not really seeing the benefits of insurance, here.<\/p>\n
When I asked her to please measure my pupilary distance, you’d think I’d just sprouted some grotesque appendage from some unspeakable orifice and presented it to her to be given a tongue-bath. She said, and I quote “Oh! You’re being sneaky–you’re going to order glasses from the internet, aren’t you?”<\/p>\n
“I don’t see how being sneaky has anything to do with it. I deserve to have glasses that I’m thrilled about as I’m the one who has to live with them every single day, with every outfit, with every makeup application, for dress up, for dress down–they reflect ME. And whether they’re $20 on the internet or $500 on the internet or purchased from a physical location or anywhere inbetween, it has nothing to do with your business and everything to do with me.”<\/p>\n
Her mouth was still gaping when I left.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I just got back from the optometrist, and shockingly enough, my vision has IMPROVED over the last three years instead of worsened. Perhaps I do not yet have to resign myself to waking up one day, utterly blind. After the exam, they laid out my options according to my insurance: they’ll cover up to $120… Continue reading